During professional conversations with clients, I often ask them to describe the most important thing that they can leave to their children and grandchildren. “Money?” I’ll ask.

“No,” a typical client will respond, “They can blow the money or do foolish things with it. I don’t think that the money means a whole lot when you weren’t the one who had to go out there and earn it.”

“So if you were Tiger Woods, and could only leave one of two ‘baskets’ to your heirs,” I continue, “would you rather leave them a basket that contains shiny trophies and millions of dollars, or would you prefer to leave them a basket that contains your golf swing and the mental toughness it requires to win major golf tournaments?”

“My golf swing and mental toughness, of course! With that they can make millions on their own and they would also understand the value of what they have accomplished!”

“What you are telling me, then,” I’ll paraphrase, “is that you would much rather leave your children and grandchildren your values, knowledge and experience - if you could do it - as opposed to all of your cash and assets.”

“Exactly!” they’ll reply, “But how do you leave that to someone in a will or trust?” 

That’s where a good estate plan can fit in. Most people think of estate planning as simply legal documents that divide and distribute your financial assets among your heirs. An estate plan that instead seeks to transfer wisdom, experience and values takes a multifaceted approach and occurs over a series of years. 

Something as ubiquitous as a revocable living trust, for example, requires careful thought as to whom will act as trustee over your financial world should you become incapacitated. Here, you can choose to name a family member and keep them in the dark until they are called upon to act, or you can choose to involve him or her with your trusted advisors now, while you are active and healthy and able to impart your knowledge and experience. 

You took a long time to earn and to build your estate. It came with hard work, dedication and a certain approach to saving and spending. You worked with a team of advisors over the years, including your attorney, accountant and financial advisor. In the best of circumstances it would be difficult for a family member to be suddenly thrust into a position of authority with these professionals that they may not know nor have any prior interactions with. 

Instead, how about creating separate trusts for your heirs now, while you are alive? You can fund them over time according to your ability, and have your heirs work with you and your advisors now, so that when the time comes for them to act for you, they have had years of experience. They can also benefit by learning how you approach real estate investments, the stock market, spending and saving for retirement. In essence, why not teach your heirs your golf swing now, as opposed to laying it all out in a legal manual for them to read once you become disabled or die.